VTG - Prototype: Part two

For those eager to hear about how Tentacle Rape and Metal Gear Solid combine outside of fanfiction fear not; Part two is here.

Ok, I've plugged my controller into control port 2. Now fucking what?

Stealth then. It doesn't make much sense but then I don't mind it as much as I should for some reason. It's bloody annoying, as to stealth absorb (where you go behind them and give them a big hug. All soldiers secretly crave this) you have to be really close. But your character pushes people aside automatically when close and if you double tap a direction to finesse your walking you do a flying roll forward.

(Mashes the square button) UH-UH-UH-UH-UH-UH *SNAP* "Snake? Snake?! Snaaaaaaaaaakkkee!"

This has lead to some hysterical (for me) situations, where I'll go flying foward into the person I'm trying to stealth absorb and send them flat on their face, but thanks to broken stealth this doesn't raise suspicions at all. The situation goes like this in my head -

"Corporal! Private Jones just crushed my spine whilst attempting to do a flying forward roll on patrol."
"Oh that's fine sir, he does it all the time."
"Really? Military personnel just randomly fling themselves at any moment?"
"It's practice for dodging bullets sir"
"Very well then. Promote Private Jones for forward thinking at once!"

I keep searching for a caption, but all I can say is I haven't a fucking clue what's going on here. I think it could be love.

But playing it stealthily (though with its merits) misses the main aim of Prototype, which I feel is to gorily just smash everything with excessive collateral damage. In GTA, collateral is normaly something you set out to cause or are at least aware when you do so. In Prototype though when Civilian deaths happen I for the life of me have no idea when I mowed them down, as they aren't even punished. At all. Infact they're even given as a positive statistic, and as much as I try in a mission I always kill about a hundred unknowingly.

Believe it or not, this was a stealth mission.

Ah, Combat. Now here's the meat and two veg of the game, which it gladly swings infront of your face at every opportunity. The powers themselves are pretty diverse and cool, from tentacle whipping and blobfists to blade arms and full body armour. Combined with the fluidity of movement and there's plenty of fun to be had. Fancy performing the people's elbow from atop the Empire State Building? Then this game is for you (not recommended to fulfil this fantasy in real life).

Kicked ass : 5 points. Pulled heroic pose afterwards: 10 points. How cool you feel whilst playing: Priceless. For everything else there's mastercard.

Against normal foes you do feel like a killing god, until you get to a boss fight where it seems Dante from Devil May Cry came over and spilt his seed into the game. In short, they're attrition fests. Weirdly though, like the stealth they didn't annoy me as much as they should've. It seems Prototype has this strange phenomena where there's parts which would be unforgivable in ordinary games but which I would gladly play through here. What it does get right makes you forget any annoyances you may have had till after you've just finished a 4 hour session.

OMGWTFHAX *Sepiroth14 has left the game*

As I sit here, I've easily got enough to do a third post. I've still got to cover the combat in depth about fighting and hijacking, let alone mention the fun that can be had in Free-running (it's unbelievably great, which is an efficient summary). But I'm not here to do a proper review, just briefly what I enjoyed from the game as well as annoyed me (which is a part review I admit Jaz). At £35/$45 I don't think it's worth the price till it drops by about 10 or 15, but it is ridiculously good fun. Plus, you can fly and pick up cars as a dumpy 45 year old woman. Did I mention that?


  1. "I'm not here to do a proper review, just briefly what I enjoyed from the game as well as annoyed me."

    ....yeah, that's a review. :D

    I'm enjoying this series a lot. Post ten!

  2. Tempted to get this just so I can write about Martha the 45 year old dumpy woman who got laid off from work then goes on a rampage of the highest order.

    "This comes as a shock at first when used to sandboxing in games like GTA or Assassin's Creed, as there though civilians die you're aware of when you do so" could possibly do with a re-shuffle but good post man.

  3. @ Jaz Well I didn't mention enough detail to constitute it as a full review I thought. Like there's other annoying parts, such as when you're given the cancer or something which stops you from using all your powers for a good two HOUR stretch.

    @ Waste_Manager Yeah, I really shouldn't write when so tired. Normally each of my posts gets about 7 re-edits after posting, as I read again and again what I put. Here I rushed and I think it shows.